I’m determined to reclaim my joy

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There’s been an ache in the pit of my stomach, and I’ve been filled with anxiety. My nerves have been fraught, and my fuse has been short. I’ve no doubt that all of this can be blamed on our collective 2024 bingo card. You know – historic flooding, numerous hurricanes, a new strain of COVID, the economy, ugly national politics, divisive local politics, etc. You get my drift.

All of this has resulted in a desperate need for me to recenter myself.

In times past, there were several methods that proved satisfactory – taking deep breaths, closing my eyes and meditating. Well, I may not have been actually meditating, but closing my eyes and focusing on my breathing would often work. Or, conjuring up memories and thinking of things that are beautiful, funny or heartwarming was another option. Listening to music would usually help. And a surefire method that would often work was taking a break from social media.

Problem is, none of my usual tried and true methods have been working lately.

Determined to reclaim my joy, I’ve been more than willing to attempt new and different ways to do that.

I’ve become a big fan of dog videos in recent years. Baby videos are good too and if you want the best of both worlds, combine the two and watch dog and baby videos. Some of my recent faves have been dogs rocking babies to sleep.

I also enjoy watching those time-lapse videos where you watch someone painting or doing fancy lettering. Those tend to be relaxing.

Oftentimes, I envision the ocean and imagine the sounds of the waves crashing. That repetitive sound never fails to relax and recenter me. Plus, looking out over the ocean at the infinite horizon makes one realize how miniscule they, and their problems, are.

Several months ago, a friend turned me on to Substack, an online platform that allows writers, journalists, and other content creators to publish newsletters, podcasts, and other content, and earn money through subscriptions. In recent weeks, I’ve found myself turning to it more and more. And you never know what you’ll find.

It’s been comforting to see that I’m not the only one feeling adrift.

EricR, @lonepilgrim, had a post titled, “Joy requires no words.” It was the sweetest video of the children of the Goede Hoop Marimba Band in South Africa performing the music of Vivaldi. I lost count of how many times I watched it.

Julia Turshen, @turshen, delighted me with her simple, yet amazing, handwritten diagrams that are basically formulas for making everything from bean salads to smoothies to sheet pan meals. She has a new cookbook out, “What Goes with What: 100 Recipes, 20 Charts, Endless Possibilities” that may end up on my Christmas list.

Clintavo, @clintavo, had a thought-provoking post - “Creating art not only saves your soul, it grows it as well.”

No matter what you may be searching for, Substack provides lots of food for thought.

I took art lessons as a child and enjoyed the process, even winning a first-place blue ribbon in a local art show for one of my still lifes of a bowl of fruit.

I’ve wanted to get back into painting for some time but felt that getting back into acrylics was too much of an investment, both timewise and monetarily. I decided to try my hand at watercolors instead. It’s less of an investment – both time and money – and is a relatively forgiving medium.

I got up early this past Monday morning and drove to Walmart to purchase a set of watercolors, a set of brushes and a sketch pad. I went home and tried my hand at reproducing a photo of Broken Bow Lake that I’d taken when we vacationed there this summer. The result wasn’t perfect, but it was good, and it made me happy. I truly enjoyed myself. Then I headed to the office to begin my workday.

The following morning, I got up and painted again before going to work. That night as I drifted off to sleep, I found myself thinking about what I might paint the following morning. It’s become my new morning routine. I shower and fix my face and then drink coffee and paint.

I’ve reclaimed my joy and discovered a new hobby in the process. Best of all though? The relaxed happiness I feel afterward better equips me to head to work and slay the day’s dragons.